Ok, so I'm sort of getting ahead of myself this time. It's not yet 2006 yet and I'm writing as if 2005 passed already. I'm just excited to sum up the whole year since I just turned twenty three last week.
This year was all about new beginnings. I started with having someone in my life who literally changed every tiny bit of my life. Don't get me wrong, I'm not complaining. I needed someone who could truly show me that there was more to life than being jaded. I tried to figure things out as we went along our relationship and soon, I found myself looking at a brand new me. It took lots of guts on his part to stick it out with my stubborn self. I'm not perfect, and I don't intend to be, but I guess even I had to agree that I was a better me because of him.
Another new beginning started last June 17, 2005. It was the day we chose to open a rather risky investment called ORANGE CHICKEN! Everyone at home was having sleepless nights and 18-hour work hours, but it was worth it. Things are not perfect yet, but we're all working hard to do something about it. Putting up a business is not as simple as other people think. It gave me stress, bulges, eyebags, and one simple pleasure: being my own boss. In the end, the store gave us hope that we could still make it here at home sa Pinas. We don't know what the future of the store holds but we can only hope for a better and bigger business.
Yet another start was the fact that I'm starting to consider a career in writing. I used to be realy insecure with my writing but I guess all I needed was someone to push me and believe in me. So, this is it, I hope it really goes well.
There were lots of arguments, situations, circumstances, and the like that makes this year another one to remember. I think I'll bring the rest of the good ones next year.
On another note, I would love to see someone get struck by lightning. **I cross my fingers and wish some more....No pun intended, just wanted to make someone smile, you know how much I love you... =)
Tuesday, November 22, 2005
Tuesday, November 08, 2005
The power of words....
I'd like to quote my friend joacs...you have a gift for words..."Knowing something is the beginning of a long process of acceptance. And in the middle of accepting truths and lies in life, sometimes you just have to rechannel that anger or frustration somewhere else. And hopefully, it doesn't accidentally fall on someone you respect and/or love."
I am rechanneling my anger towards writing instead of causing violence and pain. But I do believe in KARMA. Tamaan ka sana ng kidlat.
(smiles...chuckles...and smiles again....thinking if Icould sing the song ako ang nagwagi...or was that the title of that song?!)
I am rechanneling my anger towards writing instead of causing violence and pain. But I do believe in KARMA. Tamaan ka sana ng kidlat.
(smiles...chuckles...and smiles again....thinking if Icould sing the song ako ang nagwagi...or was that the title of that song?!)
TODAY
Today I woke up with a smile
the same smile I had when we got together...
I still look at you lovingly
and I know I will through out the rest of our lives..
when you said you'll do everything....I know you meant it...
I love you rabbit...
Enough said...
the same smile I had when we got together...
I still look at you lovingly
and I know I will through out the rest of our lives..
when you said you'll do everything....I know you meant it...
I love you rabbit...
Enough said...
Tuesday, September 27, 2005
Oh the Men in my life..
I'm dying right now waiting for my hubby to fetch me from work. Somehow in the past eight months, my love for this guy grew from zero to infinity. I can't seem t0 get enough of him just like my bestfriend Lara can't get enough of her mr. smooch.
MEN.
We just can't live without them. I know my mom agrees with me. She practically worships the ground my dad walks on...and I can't blame her. Some men can be total jerks but the men in my life are simply awesome. Lee takes care of me like no one else does and even offered to do the laundry when we're married already. (even if he doesn't know how to...) My dad drives me around and thinks I'm still her little girl. My brothers Jig and Jared are my constant companion during dvd marathon nights or late night snacks.
I don't know if it's just pure luck but I am one lucky girl to have them.
To the men in my life, I offer you more laughter and buckets of beer!
MEN.
We just can't live without them. I know my mom agrees with me. She practically worships the ground my dad walks on...and I can't blame her. Some men can be total jerks but the men in my life are simply awesome. Lee takes care of me like no one else does and even offered to do the laundry when we're married already. (even if he doesn't know how to...) My dad drives me around and thinks I'm still her little girl. My brothers Jig and Jared are my constant companion during dvd marathon nights or late night snacks.
I don't know if it's just pure luck but I am one lucky girl to have them.
To the men in my life, I offer you more laughter and buckets of beer!
Monday, September 12, 2005
Weary
this weary heart
often wonders of that dream
yet wishes seldom come true
lost in the winds of change
to cope is what she must do
declare not the impossible
i promise not to
until that day of yonder
im a little bit pessimistic, less anxious, and more into looking out for what's next after dreaming....
often wonders of that dream
yet wishes seldom come true
lost in the winds of change
to cope is what she must do
declare not the impossible
i promise not to
until that day of yonder
im a little bit pessimistic, less anxious, and more into looking out for what's next after dreaming....
Saturday, July 30, 2005
ON COMMITMENT
"The most important, most critical component in successful loving is commitment. Not love."
--part of an essay sent by my bestfriend emogurl..
I remember my favorite teacher in college, Fr. Dacanay, telling us to "think twice before jumping into a commitment because it takes lots of guts to work to it out.." Two years and a couple of months later, I saw myself in the same predicament, this time, with my first, real relationship.
I feel like I'm back in school, only this time, learning the art of commitment. People close to me know just how much of a hard headed, no nonsense "bitch" I can be. I was not one to show buckets of tears, or better yet give my wholeself completely. Pride is the only word I can attribute to it. Yet, in the course of this relationship that I am in, I gave in. I am trying to lose all pride and selfishness for him because he willingly gave up his own.
I guess you could say I finally met my match but the hard part isn't over. Keeping that love alive is the real challenge. Sometimes I see old couples in the movie house holding hands and still looking very much in love. And I say to myself, "I want that kind of relationship, one that undoubtedly stands the test of time, but how?"
Then, I saw myself again sitting in one of Fr. Dacanay's lectures on commitment. I start to smile because I know now the secret of lasting relationships. And boy, it does take lots of guts to work out differences and conflicts, money matters and trivial things, but these are nothing when I know that at the end of the day, I have someone to go home to.
this one's for lee...I owe you, big time.
--part of an essay sent by my bestfriend emogurl..
I remember my favorite teacher in college, Fr. Dacanay, telling us to "think twice before jumping into a commitment because it takes lots of guts to work to it out.." Two years and a couple of months later, I saw myself in the same predicament, this time, with my first, real relationship.
I feel like I'm back in school, only this time, learning the art of commitment. People close to me know just how much of a hard headed, no nonsense "bitch" I can be. I was not one to show buckets of tears, or better yet give my wholeself completely. Pride is the only word I can attribute to it. Yet, in the course of this relationship that I am in, I gave in. I am trying to lose all pride and selfishness for him because he willingly gave up his own.
I guess you could say I finally met my match but the hard part isn't over. Keeping that love alive is the real challenge. Sometimes I see old couples in the movie house holding hands and still looking very much in love. And I say to myself, "I want that kind of relationship, one that undoubtedly stands the test of time, but how?"
Then, I saw myself again sitting in one of Fr. Dacanay's lectures on commitment. I start to smile because I know now the secret of lasting relationships. And boy, it does take lots of guts to work out differences and conflicts, money matters and trivial things, but these are nothing when I know that at the end of the day, I have someone to go home to.
this one's for lee...I owe you, big time.
Thursday, June 23, 2005
ORANGE CHICKEN!
Hey everyone....ORANGE CHICKEN! is now open at 8101 Pearl Plaza, Pearl Drive, Ortigas Center, Pasig City!!!!!!!! See you there!!!!!!!!!11
Tuesday, May 17, 2005
On Any Given Day
You never find yourself until you face the truth. - Pearl Bailey
Life isn't about finding yourself. Life is about creating yourself.
-George Bernard Shaw
I feel that I have lost myself - any centre as it were, has shifted from its natural interests, and that it will take me a long time finding myself again. - Yeats
"Happiness is the experience of loving life. Being happy is being in love with that momentary experience. And love is looking at someone or even something and seeing the absolute best in him/her or it. Love is happiness with what you see. So love and happiness really are the same thing... just expressed differently."
--Robert McPhillips
On any given day, ask me anything about me and I will be able to say something. I have always took it upon myself to get to know me pretty well so much so that I know my dreams, my strengths, and my weaknesses like the back of my hand. And yet, more often than not, things change and people adapt to that change. The future is but a gray area. One can only dream or see a glimpse of it.
Someone once told me that in order to see your future, you must look at your present and the key to your present state is looking at your past. Sounds pretty simple but its actually a hard task at hand.
I know that I have changed a lot and have been transformed by the people around me. Now that an uncertain future lies before my eyes, I realized that I am lost. The only thing I'm certain is my will to survive in the midst of chaos.
Help me survive...
Life isn't about finding yourself. Life is about creating yourself.
-George Bernard Shaw
I feel that I have lost myself - any centre as it were, has shifted from its natural interests, and that it will take me a long time finding myself again. - Yeats
"Happiness is the experience of loving life. Being happy is being in love with that momentary experience. And love is looking at someone or even something and seeing the absolute best in him/her or it. Love is happiness with what you see. So love and happiness really are the same thing... just expressed differently."
--Robert McPhillips
On any given day, ask me anything about me and I will be able to say something. I have always took it upon myself to get to know me pretty well so much so that I know my dreams, my strengths, and my weaknesses like the back of my hand. And yet, more often than not, things change and people adapt to that change. The future is but a gray area. One can only dream or see a glimpse of it.
Someone once told me that in order to see your future, you must look at your present and the key to your present state is looking at your past. Sounds pretty simple but its actually a hard task at hand.
I know that I have changed a lot and have been transformed by the people around me. Now that an uncertain future lies before my eyes, I realized that I am lost. The only thing I'm certain is my will to survive in the midst of chaos.
Help me survive...
Wednesday, May 11, 2005
Never Quitting Life
It's tempting to wish for a perfect parent or a perfect boss. But, sometimes, the best we can do is to hang in there and not to quit... to play the hand we've been dealt with and accesorize the outfit we've got. ~ Sex and the City
When things don't go the way you want it to be, hope is instantly lost but is regained again once you've decided to take a step further and do something about it. Sounds pretty easy? Not.
It takes a lot of courage for a kid to stand up and not cry when he or she gets embarassed in front of friends or classmates. It takes a lot of gut for a guy who have been constantly dumped by the same girl to say hi to her again the next day like nothing happened. It takes enormous willpower for an employee to say his ideas when all the big bosses are there. Men and women take great pains in overcoming obstacles in the personal lives. Whether it be issues with family, friends, work, lovelife, social life, and others.
Each of us have different ways in coping with what life is currently offering us and in every little detail of one's life are choices. You may take it upon yourself to do something about a problem or you can just let it pass and hope that someone will rescue you from it. One thing leads to another with the choices that we make.
Sometimes, being alive is tiring. Sometimes all you want to do is dissapear even for just a minute, to feel nothing, to see nothing, to forget... but that's wishful thinking.Truth is, reality bites and when it does, it leaves a mark right at the back of your head and it reminds you to keep going...to hang in there because when you give up on yourself, you stop living.
I refuse to stop living. I am tired, I am weak but I will keep going....
When things don't go the way you want it to be, hope is instantly lost but is regained again once you've decided to take a step further and do something about it. Sounds pretty easy? Not.
It takes a lot of courage for a kid to stand up and not cry when he or she gets embarassed in front of friends or classmates. It takes a lot of gut for a guy who have been constantly dumped by the same girl to say hi to her again the next day like nothing happened. It takes enormous willpower for an employee to say his ideas when all the big bosses are there. Men and women take great pains in overcoming obstacles in the personal lives. Whether it be issues with family, friends, work, lovelife, social life, and others.
Each of us have different ways in coping with what life is currently offering us and in every little detail of one's life are choices. You may take it upon yourself to do something about a problem or you can just let it pass and hope that someone will rescue you from it. One thing leads to another with the choices that we make.
Sometimes, being alive is tiring. Sometimes all you want to do is dissapear even for just a minute, to feel nothing, to see nothing, to forget... but that's wishful thinking.Truth is, reality bites and when it does, it leaves a mark right at the back of your head and it reminds you to keep going...to hang in there because when you give up on yourself, you stop living.
I refuse to stop living. I am tired, I am weak but I will keep going....
Wednesday, May 04, 2005
It's a Family Thing
Call it a clan, call it a network, call it a tribe, call it a family:
Whatever you call it, whoever you are, you need one.--Jane Howard
Family life is full of major and minor crises -- the ups and downs of health, success and failure in career, marriage, and divorce -- and all kinds of characters. It is tied to places and events and histories. With all of these felt details, life etches itself into memory and personality. It's difficult to imagine anything more nourishing to the soul.--Thomas Moore
People are lucky because there's this thing called family. Then again maybe some people are luckier because they choose not to have anything to do with their families. I think not and yet either way...a person is only lucky because he chooses to be. It has been proven that no matter what you do, you will still go back to your family.
Being the eldest, I have particularly seen my own family at its best and worst. It's a love and hate relationship for me but at the end of the day, I choose to love. Thinking about having my own family is scary and exciting at the same time. It's a constant sifting of which values to uphold, which traditions to remember, or what things must be thrown out. But how does one adjust to a new family given marriage for example? I know for a fact that when my mom married my dad, she became a new woman by adapting to the ways of my dad's family (which is not bad at all). Is that going to happen to me once I change my surname? I don't know. Maybe not or maybe yes but most probably the important thing to worry about is the family that I'm going to build.
Today, it's harder to marry at a young age since it's tough to raise a family. Some might marry but won't have any kids until after a few years or so. Our helper at home has 6 kids and she barely even earns minimum wage and yet she seems happy with her life. A friend of mine has been married for 5 years, is living a comfortable life but still has no child and has been wanting one. The fact that I'm even writing about this means I'm thinking already of having one but only when the right time comes.
Perfect timing to have one would probably be when I can sleep at night not having to worry about what my child or children will eat the next day, or whether we can send our kid to school or not, or better yet, whether I can give him/her the best things that life has to offer---and I mean not just material things but emotional, intellectual, and physical support.
And though it's a bit scary to jump into the water, when I feel right about it, I'm gonna go ahead and dive. I guess right now the greater goal is to earn enough money because it sure is hella expensive to raise a family. Believe me, I know...my dad has gone bald because of it!
Whatever you call it, whoever you are, you need one.--Jane Howard
Family life is full of major and minor crises -- the ups and downs of health, success and failure in career, marriage, and divorce -- and all kinds of characters. It is tied to places and events and histories. With all of these felt details, life etches itself into memory and personality. It's difficult to imagine anything more nourishing to the soul.--Thomas Moore
People are lucky because there's this thing called family. Then again maybe some people are luckier because they choose not to have anything to do with their families. I think not and yet either way...a person is only lucky because he chooses to be. It has been proven that no matter what you do, you will still go back to your family.
Being the eldest, I have particularly seen my own family at its best and worst. It's a love and hate relationship for me but at the end of the day, I choose to love. Thinking about having my own family is scary and exciting at the same time. It's a constant sifting of which values to uphold, which traditions to remember, or what things must be thrown out. But how does one adjust to a new family given marriage for example? I know for a fact that when my mom married my dad, she became a new woman by adapting to the ways of my dad's family (which is not bad at all). Is that going to happen to me once I change my surname? I don't know. Maybe not or maybe yes but most probably the important thing to worry about is the family that I'm going to build.
Today, it's harder to marry at a young age since it's tough to raise a family. Some might marry but won't have any kids until after a few years or so. Our helper at home has 6 kids and she barely even earns minimum wage and yet she seems happy with her life. A friend of mine has been married for 5 years, is living a comfortable life but still has no child and has been wanting one. The fact that I'm even writing about this means I'm thinking already of having one but only when the right time comes.
Perfect timing to have one would probably be when I can sleep at night not having to worry about what my child or children will eat the next day, or whether we can send our kid to school or not, or better yet, whether I can give him/her the best things that life has to offer---and I mean not just material things but emotional, intellectual, and physical support.
And though it's a bit scary to jump into the water, when I feel right about it, I'm gonna go ahead and dive. I guess right now the greater goal is to earn enough money because it sure is hella expensive to raise a family. Believe me, I know...my dad has gone bald because of it!
Monday, April 25, 2005
Friendship to the Rescue
How many times have I refused asking for help just because I did not want to bother people with my trivial problems? How many times have I turned down help just when I really needed it? Needless to say, I have become too independent without me knowing it. Not until I became dependent on someone that I realized just how important it is to have a friend, a lover, or family to watch your back every time you make mistakes or you encounter difficulties in life. I knew then that to admit that you are weak doesn't mean you're weak...it only means that you acknowledge your own imperfection.
And as I write this, I recall one of my best girl friends who's undergoing difficulties with her personal life. (Yes, it may seem that you never learn from past mistakes but it's there to make you sure that you do the next time a similar problem appears in your life..) Another close friend is undergoing marital problems, a slightly deeper one than the former friend I mentioned. She already lost 15 lbs. just thinking about it. Not a really good way to lose weight though. Anyway, we all decided to meet up one of these days just to talk.
For me, it is important for a woman to have a close set of girl friends to run to each time she is faced with trials or bumps on her road. Much like the celebrated Sex and the City women who seem to have been the shock absorber of each other. Certainly, it's way better than to pay an expensive psychiatrist who treats your problem scientifically rather than to empathize with you.
So I guess to all my girl friends, here's a little note: it's ok to ask for help expecially when you know that what you need is a woman's ear.
And as I write this, I recall one of my best girl friends who's undergoing difficulties with her personal life. (Yes, it may seem that you never learn from past mistakes but it's there to make you sure that you do the next time a similar problem appears in your life..) Another close friend is undergoing marital problems, a slightly deeper one than the former friend I mentioned. She already lost 15 lbs. just thinking about it. Not a really good way to lose weight though. Anyway, we all decided to meet up one of these days just to talk.
For me, it is important for a woman to have a close set of girl friends to run to each time she is faced with trials or bumps on her road. Much like the celebrated Sex and the City women who seem to have been the shock absorber of each other. Certainly, it's way better than to pay an expensive psychiatrist who treats your problem scientifically rather than to empathize with you.
So I guess to all my girl friends, here's a little note: it's ok to ask for help expecially when you know that what you need is a woman's ear.
Wednesday, April 20, 2005
His Wretched Soul
I know a man..
who lost his spirit
who couldn't be
what he wanted to be
who thinks he's less
but in truth,
he was more
His eyes speak of a battered soul
indefinite and swollen
insecurity grips him
his heart, torn apart
alone, he stood
against a life
he wanted to vanish from
his voice,
paved the way to freedom
but left him wounded to the core
I know a man who's like a little child
I know...
Because tonight, I sing to him my greatest lullaby...
It was and still is worth the risk to be with you...
who lost his spirit
who couldn't be
what he wanted to be
who thinks he's less
but in truth,
he was more
His eyes speak of a battered soul
indefinite and swollen
insecurity grips him
his heart, torn apart
alone, he stood
against a life
he wanted to vanish from
his voice,
paved the way to freedom
but left him wounded to the core
I know a man who's like a little child
I know...
Because tonight, I sing to him my greatest lullaby...
It was and still is worth the risk to be with you...
Friday, April 15, 2005
Baby Talk
I've been catching up on my mail lately and I have been inspired by what people have been seending. Normally I would just delete forwarded messages but I really couldn't help but be touched about this one email I got. Here it goes....
What does Love mean?
A group of professional people posed this question to a group of 4- to 8-year-olds, "What does love mean?" The answers they got were broader and deeper than anyone could have imagined. See what you think:
"When my grandmother got arthritis, she couldn't bend over and paint her toenails anymore. So my grandfather does it for her all the time, even when his hands got arthritis too. That's love."
Rebecca- age 8
When someone loves you, the way they say your name is different. You just know that your name is safe in their mouth."
Billy - age 4
"Love is when a girl puts on perfume and a boy puts on shaving cologne and they go out and smell each other."
Karl - age 5
"Love is when you go out to eat and give somebody most of your French fries without making them give you any of theirs."
Chrissy -age 6
"Love is what makes you smile when you're tired."
Terri - age 4
"Love is when my mommy makes coffee for my daddy and she takes a sip before giving it to him, to make sure the taste is OK."
Danny - age 7
"Love is when you kiss all the time. Then when you get tired of kissing, you still want to be together and you talk more. My Mommy and Daddy are like that. They look gross when they kiss"
Emily - age 8
"Love is what's in the room with you at Christmas if you stop opening presents and listen."
Bobby - age 7 (Wow!)
"If you want to learn to love better, you should start with a friend who you hate,"
Nikka - age 6 (we need a few million more Nikka's on this planet)
"Love is when you tell a guy you like his shirt, then he wears it everyday."
Noelle - age 7
"Love is like a little old woman and a little old man who are still friends even after they know each other so well."
Tommy - age 6
"During my piano recital, I was on a stage and I was scared. I looked at all the people watching me and saw my daddy waving and smiling. He was the only one doing that. I wasn't scared anymore."
Cindy - age 8
"My mommy loves me more than anybody. You don't see anyone else kissing me to sleep at night."
Clare - age 6
"Love is when Mommy gives Daddy the best piece of chicken."
Elaine-age 5
"Love is when Mommy sees Daddy smelly and sweaty and still says he is handsomer than Robert Redford."
Chris - age 7
"Love is when your puppy licks your face even after you left him alone all day." (my personal favorite)
Mary Ann - age 4
"I know my older sister loves me because she gives me all her old clothes and has to go out and buy new ones."
Lauren - age 4
"When you love somebody, your eyelashes go up and down and little stars come out of you." (what an imagination)
Karen - age 7
"Love is when Mommy sees Daddy on the toilet and she doesn't think it's gross."
Mark - age 6
"You really shouldn't say 'I love you' unless you mean it. But if you mean it, you should say it a lot. People forget."
Jessica - age 8
And the final one -- Author and lecturer Leo Buscaglia once talked about a contest he was asked to judge. The purpose of the contest was to find the most caring child.
The winner was a four year old child whose next door neighbor was an elderly gentleman who had recently lost his wife. Upon seeing the man cry, the little boy went into the old gentleman's yard, climbed onto his lap, and just sat there. When his Mother asked what he had said to the neighbor, the little boy said, "Nothing, I just helped him cry"
What does Love mean?
A group of professional people posed this question to a group of 4- to 8-year-olds, "What does love mean?" The answers they got were broader and deeper than anyone could have imagined. See what you think:
"When my grandmother got arthritis, she couldn't bend over and paint her toenails anymore. So my grandfather does it for her all the time, even when his hands got arthritis too. That's love."
Rebecca- age 8
When someone loves you, the way they say your name is different. You just know that your name is safe in their mouth."
Billy - age 4
"Love is when a girl puts on perfume and a boy puts on shaving cologne and they go out and smell each other."
Karl - age 5
"Love is when you go out to eat and give somebody most of your French fries without making them give you any of theirs."
Chrissy -age 6
"Love is what makes you smile when you're tired."
Terri - age 4
"Love is when my mommy makes coffee for my daddy and she takes a sip before giving it to him, to make sure the taste is OK."
Danny - age 7
"Love is when you kiss all the time. Then when you get tired of kissing, you still want to be together and you talk more. My Mommy and Daddy are like that. They look gross when they kiss"
Emily - age 8
"Love is what's in the room with you at Christmas if you stop opening presents and listen."
Bobby - age 7 (Wow!)
"If you want to learn to love better, you should start with a friend who you hate,"
Nikka - age 6 (we need a few million more Nikka's on this planet)
"Love is when you tell a guy you like his shirt, then he wears it everyday."
Noelle - age 7
"Love is like a little old woman and a little old man who are still friends even after they know each other so well."
Tommy - age 6
"During my piano recital, I was on a stage and I was scared. I looked at all the people watching me and saw my daddy waving and smiling. He was the only one doing that. I wasn't scared anymore."
Cindy - age 8
"My mommy loves me more than anybody. You don't see anyone else kissing me to sleep at night."
Clare - age 6
"Love is when Mommy gives Daddy the best piece of chicken."
Elaine-age 5
"Love is when Mommy sees Daddy smelly and sweaty and still says he is handsomer than Robert Redford."
Chris - age 7
"Love is when your puppy licks your face even after you left him alone all day." (my personal favorite)
Mary Ann - age 4
"I know my older sister loves me because she gives me all her old clothes and has to go out and buy new ones."
Lauren - age 4
"When you love somebody, your eyelashes go up and down and little stars come out of you." (what an imagination)
Karen - age 7
"Love is when Mommy sees Daddy on the toilet and she doesn't think it's gross."
Mark - age 6
"You really shouldn't say 'I love you' unless you mean it. But if you mean it, you should say it a lot. People forget."
Jessica - age 8
And the final one -- Author and lecturer Leo Buscaglia once talked about a contest he was asked to judge. The purpose of the contest was to find the most caring child.
The winner was a four year old child whose next door neighbor was an elderly gentleman who had recently lost his wife. Upon seeing the man cry, the little boy went into the old gentleman's yard, climbed onto his lap, and just sat there. When his Mother asked what he had said to the neighbor, the little boy said, "Nothing, I just helped him cry"
Wednesday, April 13, 2005
Riding the Bus
Love is like waiting for a bus. When the bus comes, you look at it and you say to yourself "eeee...so full....cannot sit down, I'll wait for the next one."So you let the bus go and waited for the second bus. Then the second bus came, you looked at it and you said, "eeee...this bus is so old...so shabby!"
So you let the bus go and again, decided to wait for the next bus. After a while another bus came, it's not crowded,not old but you said, "eeee...not air conditioned...better wait for the next one." So again you let the bus go and decided to wait for the next
bus. Then the sky started to get dark as it was getting late. You panicked and jumped immediately inside the next bus. It is not until much later that you found out that you had boarded the wrong bus!
And you wasted your time and money just to get into the wrong one!
Even if an air conditioned bus comes, you can't ensure that the air conditioned bus won't break down or whether or not the airconditioner will be too cold for you.
Wanting to get what you want is not wrong. But it wouldn't hurt to give other people a chance. If you find that the "bus" doesn't suit you just press the red button and get off the bus! Hey, who
said life is fair??? The best thing to do is be observant and open-minded. If it doesn't suit you, get off.
I'm sure you've had this experience before. You saw a bus coming (the bus you want of course). You flagged it but the driver acted as if he did not see you and zoomed pass you! It just wasn't meant
for you!
The bottom line is, being loved is like waiting for a bus you want. Getting on the bus and appreciating the bus by giving it a chance depends totally on you. If you haven't made any choice, WALK!
Waking is like being single. The good side of it is you can still choose any bus you want...the rest who couldn't afford another ride would just have to be content with the bus they rode on, ugly
or not.
Also, sometimes it is better to choose a bus you are already familiar with rather than to gamble with a bus that is unfamiliar to you. But then again, life wouldn't be complete without the risks involved.But there is one bus that I failed to tell you
about.- the Bus you do not have to wait for, the Bus that will stop on its own and ask you if you wish to come inside, then take you for a joy ride for the rest of your life.
Hope you get to ride on that bus! :)
I got this thing from my bestfriend Yssa...I am happy to tell every one that I got on that bus...and because I chose well..I got the best ride...
So you let the bus go and again, decided to wait for the next bus. After a while another bus came, it's not crowded,not old but you said, "eeee...not air conditioned...better wait for the next one." So again you let the bus go and decided to wait for the next
bus. Then the sky started to get dark as it was getting late. You panicked and jumped immediately inside the next bus. It is not until much later that you found out that you had boarded the wrong bus!
And you wasted your time and money just to get into the wrong one!
Even if an air conditioned bus comes, you can't ensure that the air conditioned bus won't break down or whether or not the airconditioner will be too cold for you.
Wanting to get what you want is not wrong. But it wouldn't hurt to give other people a chance. If you find that the "bus" doesn't suit you just press the red button and get off the bus! Hey, who
said life is fair??? The best thing to do is be observant and open-minded. If it doesn't suit you, get off.
I'm sure you've had this experience before. You saw a bus coming (the bus you want of course). You flagged it but the driver acted as if he did not see you and zoomed pass you! It just wasn't meant
for you!
The bottom line is, being loved is like waiting for a bus you want. Getting on the bus and appreciating the bus by giving it a chance depends totally on you. If you haven't made any choice, WALK!
Waking is like being single. The good side of it is you can still choose any bus you want...the rest who couldn't afford another ride would just have to be content with the bus they rode on, ugly
or not.
Also, sometimes it is better to choose a bus you are already familiar with rather than to gamble with a bus that is unfamiliar to you. But then again, life wouldn't be complete without the risks involved.But there is one bus that I failed to tell you
about.- the Bus you do not have to wait for, the Bus that will stop on its own and ask you if you wish to come inside, then take you for a joy ride for the rest of your life.
Hope you get to ride on that bus! :)
I got this thing from my bestfriend Yssa...I am happy to tell every one that I got on that bus...and because I chose well..I got the best ride...
Thursday, April 07, 2005
Harmonica
Music flowing
Through sun-scorched lips
The melody,
Almost in tune with the wind
Almost in chorus with the sound of the busy street
The Rhythm
Seemingly melancholic
Strange yet familiar
Soothing yet disturbing
With memories so vivid
It was almost surreal
His eyes no longer see
The wonder of the world
His arms no longer hold
The face of a nameless child
His legs no longer tread
The path of the mighty
The air from his mouth
Speak of a forgotten past
Breathing into the harmonica
And out to the empty space
Where the living dwell
With lives as bleak as his
Jen
2004
was written for and inspired by the man with no name...
Through sun-scorched lips
The melody,
Almost in tune with the wind
Almost in chorus with the sound of the busy street
The Rhythm
Seemingly melancholic
Strange yet familiar
Soothing yet disturbing
With memories so vivid
It was almost surreal
His eyes no longer see
The wonder of the world
His arms no longer hold
The face of a nameless child
His legs no longer tread
The path of the mighty
The air from his mouth
Speak of a forgotten past
Breathing into the harmonica
And out to the empty space
Where the living dwell
With lives as bleak as his
Jen
2004
was written for and inspired by the man with no name...
Wednesday, April 06, 2005
When Hari ng Sablay Falls
Yesterday my brother got into a minor car accident that left him with a nasty lip bruise all because he chose to ride with his classmate all the way from Mamplasan to Makati. Apparently his friend had a history of over speeding and a couple of hit and runs.
My initial reaction was concern over my brother who has been accident prone ever since he was a kid. He would normally fall from a double deck bed or drop a glass of water so it wasn't really much of a surprise anymore when he got into this accident. Yet, I have to admit that this was different because he could have been seriously hurt or we could have lost him.
Among the four us, we all know that Jared is the most special sibling from the time he was born. He was a premature baby and he was able to fit into a shoe box. Every one thought he was not going to make it. In fact, he even had his baptism right there in Manila Sanitarium. When he was growing up, we noticed a lot of his quirky ways and mannerism. Almost always he would normally forget stuff even when you just mentioned it to him a couple of seconds ago. He would get bumps and bruises from being too hyper. One time, he even fell of a tricycle which left him with blood clots in his head. Inspite of his ways, Jared was very loving and sociable. He was able to mingle with people from all walks of life. He was also mature in dealing with his own problems. Moreover, he is one of the most popular and smart guys in his batch.
In his lifetime, my brother has probably endured a lot of pain that he already developed a high tolerance for it. Sometimes we would tease him and call him "hari ng sablay" (as in Sugarfree's current hit.) Inspite of this, I am proud that he is my brother. He is my ally and my friend and I wouldn't want to lose him over some freaking careless driver. Sometimes I worry about him but I guess I would have to leave him be to learn his lessons well.
Bro, take care of yourself ayt?
My initial reaction was concern over my brother who has been accident prone ever since he was a kid. He would normally fall from a double deck bed or drop a glass of water so it wasn't really much of a surprise anymore when he got into this accident. Yet, I have to admit that this was different because he could have been seriously hurt or we could have lost him.
Among the four us, we all know that Jared is the most special sibling from the time he was born. He was a premature baby and he was able to fit into a shoe box. Every one thought he was not going to make it. In fact, he even had his baptism right there in Manila Sanitarium. When he was growing up, we noticed a lot of his quirky ways and mannerism. Almost always he would normally forget stuff even when you just mentioned it to him a couple of seconds ago. He would get bumps and bruises from being too hyper. One time, he even fell of a tricycle which left him with blood clots in his head. Inspite of his ways, Jared was very loving and sociable. He was able to mingle with people from all walks of life. He was also mature in dealing with his own problems. Moreover, he is one of the most popular and smart guys in his batch.
In his lifetime, my brother has probably endured a lot of pain that he already developed a high tolerance for it. Sometimes we would tease him and call him "hari ng sablay" (as in Sugarfree's current hit.) Inspite of this, I am proud that he is my brother. He is my ally and my friend and I wouldn't want to lose him over some freaking careless driver. Sometimes I worry about him but I guess I would have to leave him be to learn his lessons well.
Bro, take care of yourself ayt?
Friday, March 18, 2005
Mom for a Day
Some mothers are kissing mothers and some are scolding mothers, but it is love just the same, and most mothers kiss and scold together. ~Pearl S. Buck
Yesterday, I found myself babysitting two little boys. Their dad asked me to look out for them and watch the movie Robots since he will be out of the country on a business trip. I immediately said yes because one of those boys was my student.
Kienan showed me around the house and told me lots of stories while we were eating. I found myself scolding him and telling him not to talk because his mouth was full, or to sit down properly because he might fall. Memories of my mom doing the same thing to me flashed back into my head and then it occured to me that I was being a mom.
Later on, we went to Rockwell to meet up with his younger brother Kenny who was even more hyper than Kienan. Each of them held my hand while we were strolling at the mall. I was careful and cautious even when there were two helpers with me. I did not want anything to happen to them. I realized that this was probably what mothers feel all the time...that overwhelming responsibility over those little souls.
It was only during the past few years that I have developed a harmonious relationship with my mom. To me she was the most generous person but she was also such a nagger and control freak because she screams and scolds at us most of the time. But, then again because I have gotten older, I know now that my mom just loved us so much. So when she does a little bit of both hugging and screaming..it only means that we are loved.
For all the things you've done and sacrificed for us...thanks mom...
Yesterday, I found myself babysitting two little boys. Their dad asked me to look out for them and watch the movie Robots since he will be out of the country on a business trip. I immediately said yes because one of those boys was my student.
Kienan showed me around the house and told me lots of stories while we were eating. I found myself scolding him and telling him not to talk because his mouth was full, or to sit down properly because he might fall. Memories of my mom doing the same thing to me flashed back into my head and then it occured to me that I was being a mom.
Later on, we went to Rockwell to meet up with his younger brother Kenny who was even more hyper than Kienan. Each of them held my hand while we were strolling at the mall. I was careful and cautious even when there were two helpers with me. I did not want anything to happen to them. I realized that this was probably what mothers feel all the time...that overwhelming responsibility over those little souls.
It was only during the past few years that I have developed a harmonious relationship with my mom. To me she was the most generous person but she was also such a nagger and control freak because she screams and scolds at us most of the time. But, then again because I have gotten older, I know now that my mom just loved us so much. So when she does a little bit of both hugging and screaming..it only means that we are loved.
For all the things you've done and sacrificed for us...thanks mom...
Thursday, March 17, 2005
Intoxicated
You smell of fusion
drenched in perfume
and perspiration
Your eyes move as if
you were meant just to see me
your hands hold me
and it would tame me
you're intoxicating
and I am just an addict...
for everything you stand for.
for huni, life would never be the same without you...happy monthsary!
drenched in perfume
and perspiration
Your eyes move as if
you were meant just to see me
your hands hold me
and it would tame me
you're intoxicating
and I am just an addict...
for everything you stand for.
for huni, life would never be the same without you...happy monthsary!
Thursday, March 10, 2005
My Little Chinese Boy
The truly creative mind in any field is no more than this:
A human creature born abnormally, inhumanely sensitive.
To him...
a touch is a blow,
a sound is a noise,
a misfortune is a tragedy,
a joy is an ecstasy,
a friend is a lover,
a lover is a god, and
failure is death.
--Pearl Buck
Kienan is a 6-yr. old little genius in math and english. Before I met him, I started to ask Lee on how to handle highly abled individuals or gifted children for that matter. Good thing he warned me about dealing with gifted children.
There I was thinking that it wasn't going to be that big of a task since I was to assist him only in language and arts class, an area that he was really very good at. Yet, two days of working with him was enough to make me feel drained but inside of me grows this fondness for this little chinese boy.
Kienan is usually agitated in class. If he is not stomping his feet, or walks around while the teacher is explaining, he would swallow his hand. He simply won't pay attention to his teacher. In a regular school, his actions would simply convey that he has an attitude problem but most of us know that beneath his behavior is a really good student. Give him an activity sheet and he'll be able to answer everything without asking questions or even when he wasn't listening.
I promised Kienan's dad that I would be his shadow teacher until the next school year. I took the risk of helping Kienan inspite of the fact that I'm going to be busy once Orange Chicken starts its operations because I know that he can cope with his classes later on. I believe in him, and I hope that those people or parents who have special children will also believe in their kids capabilities and talents. He may not be my own but it's still good practice for me just in case I have kids of my own in the near future.
A human creature born abnormally, inhumanely sensitive.
To him...
a touch is a blow,
a sound is a noise,
a misfortune is a tragedy,
a joy is an ecstasy,
a friend is a lover,
a lover is a god, and
failure is death.
--Pearl Buck
Kienan is a 6-yr. old little genius in math and english. Before I met him, I started to ask Lee on how to handle highly abled individuals or gifted children for that matter. Good thing he warned me about dealing with gifted children.
There I was thinking that it wasn't going to be that big of a task since I was to assist him only in language and arts class, an area that he was really very good at. Yet, two days of working with him was enough to make me feel drained but inside of me grows this fondness for this little chinese boy.
Kienan is usually agitated in class. If he is not stomping his feet, or walks around while the teacher is explaining, he would swallow his hand. He simply won't pay attention to his teacher. In a regular school, his actions would simply convey that he has an attitude problem but most of us know that beneath his behavior is a really good student. Give him an activity sheet and he'll be able to answer everything without asking questions or even when he wasn't listening.
I promised Kienan's dad that I would be his shadow teacher until the next school year. I took the risk of helping Kienan inspite of the fact that I'm going to be busy once Orange Chicken starts its operations because I know that he can cope with his classes later on. I believe in him, and I hope that those people or parents who have special children will also believe in their kids capabilities and talents. He may not be my own but it's still good practice for me just in case I have kids of my own in the near future.
Wednesday, February 09, 2005
Imagine It Done.
Imagination works. It creates the blueprint of a plan, a dream, a goal, and an objective. It is a solitary thought that grows on its own when fed with ambition or the willingness to execute it into a practicable reality.--Jill Centino
Note: I got this quote from Anj's nice blog (thanks anj)...
I have always been very creative and imaginative. Certain names colors, pictures, and images appear in my head all the time. I write all these things down so that I won't be able to forget about it. After two years of working in different companies and getting myself into different fields, I am finally making my dream into a reality.
It's true what they say..when you can't sleep and stop thinking about something, you have to find a way to do whatever it is that you have to do. I felt that I wasn't cut out to be an employee and that I really wanted to be an entrepreneur.
Orange Chicken was born during those times when I couldn't sleep at night. Fortunately, I have a very supportive family. At the end of Feb or early March, we will be launching Orange Chicken. A dream that came true because of my imagination.
Note: I got this quote from Anj's nice blog (thanks anj)...
I have always been very creative and imaginative. Certain names colors, pictures, and images appear in my head all the time. I write all these things down so that I won't be able to forget about it. After two years of working in different companies and getting myself into different fields, I am finally making my dream into a reality.
It's true what they say..when you can't sleep and stop thinking about something, you have to find a way to do whatever it is that you have to do. I felt that I wasn't cut out to be an employee and that I really wanted to be an entrepreneur.
Orange Chicken was born during those times when I couldn't sleep at night. Fortunately, I have a very supportive family. At the end of Feb or early March, we will be launching Orange Chicken. A dream that came true because of my imagination.
Friday, February 04, 2005
Delicious Ambiguity
I wanted a perfect ending. Now I've learned, the hard way, that some poems don't rhyme, and some stories don't have a clear beginning, middle, and end. Life is about not knowing, having to change, taking the moment and making the best of it, without knowing what's going to happen next. Delicious Ambiguity.
--GILDA RADNER
I am very much contented with the little surprises of my life and yet I couldn't stop but think that the happiness and contentment that I am feeling right now will soon be over and replaced by misery. Quite a contradiction to my positive outlook on life.
I am scared that one day something really bad will happen and all these things that are going on in my life will soon be over in a second. Fear of the Unknown can really get to me sometimes but somehow despite the uncertainties, I still feel compelled to go on and indulge. After all, we only live once. Gilda Radner was right, life is a delicious ambiguity...and I have decided to enjoy it while I still can.
Oh and by the way, I don't regret ever taking the plunge and leaving Singledom..."Commitmenthood" agrees with me...
--GILDA RADNER
I am very much contented with the little surprises of my life and yet I couldn't stop but think that the happiness and contentment that I am feeling right now will soon be over and replaced by misery. Quite a contradiction to my positive outlook on life.
I am scared that one day something really bad will happen and all these things that are going on in my life will soon be over in a second. Fear of the Unknown can really get to me sometimes but somehow despite the uncertainties, I still feel compelled to go on and indulge. After all, we only live once. Gilda Radner was right, life is a delicious ambiguity...and I have decided to enjoy it while I still can.
Oh and by the way, I don't regret ever taking the plunge and leaving Singledom..."Commitmenthood" agrees with me...
Tuesday, January 11, 2005
Saying goodbye to Singledom
Love is a choice -- not simply, or necessarily, a rational choice, but rather a willingness to be present to others without pretense or guile. Love is a conversion to humanity -- a willingness to participate with others in the healing of a broken world and broken lives. Love is the choice to experience life as a member of the human family, a partner in the dance of life, rather than as an alien in the world or as a deity above the world, aloof and apart from human flesh.
-- Carter Heyward
Passion for Justice
Other girls would love to have a commitment..I on the other hand think otherwise...I have been single (and happy) for so long that I actually don't remember how to be a girlfriend. I think I was traumatized by past lovers and guys who hurt me, then again, I think not. I dated, I went out with friends, I did everything I ever wanted. Freedom at its peak, so to speak.
Then one day someone came and told me he likes me. (What were you thinking?!!!)
Don't get me wrong, I didn't feed him food that has "gayuma" or anything of that sort. I was myself the whole time and the one thing I couldn't believe was that someone was capable of loving/liking me even if I didn't long for anyone. (Yes, at this point I realized I have been single for so long...)
I ran away from anything that resembled commitment (romantically that is...). Just thinking about having one makes me sick..you know, that whole can't breathe, hyperventilating, ulcer attack thing happens to me... (right osang?). But then again, maybe I was wrong all along...maybe that change I was looking for was just right under my nose. Maybe I needed to commit to someone in order to feel a sense of purpose...of being loved and loving in return.
So here I am at a crossroad trying to decide whether I want to take the plunge or not. I wish I had all the time in the world to decide...but I don't..and I am bad in making decisions. A part of me is telling me to do it and to take the risk, the other part says...hold on to singledom a little bit more.
Singledom was my refuge from anything resembling pain, hurt, anger, and emotion. In singledom I was allowed to be independent, to take whenever I want to take, to give what I can only give, to love what I only want to love, to seek what I only want to seek, to cry only for the joy of my daily triumphs...I wonder, what would happen to me if I leave singledom and move to the now alien territory called Commitment.
The thought is scary but I guess I'd have to dip my hands into it...sooner or later...who knows??
-- Carter Heyward
Passion for Justice
Other girls would love to have a commitment..I on the other hand think otherwise...I have been single (and happy) for so long that I actually don't remember how to be a girlfriend. I think I was traumatized by past lovers and guys who hurt me, then again, I think not. I dated, I went out with friends, I did everything I ever wanted. Freedom at its peak, so to speak.
Then one day someone came and told me he likes me. (What were you thinking?!!!)
Don't get me wrong, I didn't feed him food that has "gayuma" or anything of that sort. I was myself the whole time and the one thing I couldn't believe was that someone was capable of loving/liking me even if I didn't long for anyone. (Yes, at this point I realized I have been single for so long...)
I ran away from anything that resembled commitment (romantically that is...). Just thinking about having one makes me sick..you know, that whole can't breathe, hyperventilating, ulcer attack thing happens to me... (right osang?). But then again, maybe I was wrong all along...maybe that change I was looking for was just right under my nose. Maybe I needed to commit to someone in order to feel a sense of purpose...of being loved and loving in return.
So here I am at a crossroad trying to decide whether I want to take the plunge or not. I wish I had all the time in the world to decide...but I don't..and I am bad in making decisions. A part of me is telling me to do it and to take the risk, the other part says...hold on to singledom a little bit more.
Singledom was my refuge from anything resembling pain, hurt, anger, and emotion. In singledom I was allowed to be independent, to take whenever I want to take, to give what I can only give, to love what I only want to love, to seek what I only want to seek, to cry only for the joy of my daily triumphs...I wonder, what would happen to me if I leave singledom and move to the now alien territory called Commitment.
The thought is scary but I guess I'd have to dip my hands into it...sooner or later...who knows??
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)