Why do you BLOG?!

What is it about blogging that makes it so popular? My blog is about 3-4 years old already but for the past two years, I have sort of "forgotten" it. I'm blogging now because I find myself doing nothing but read Brian Gorell and Kitty Go's blogs. I love both their writing styles--an eclectic mixture of wit, sarcasm, humor, and yes, grace.

When I started reading blogs again, it reminded me of my own reasons for blogging. I blogged simply because I loved writing about my experiences and other people's experiences. The blog is an avenue and an opportunity for people who simply love writing.

Two months ago, I was asked to edit/re-write an English script for an Argentinian television series. I had such a hard time writing it since I had to make the lines in synch with the scenes. I heard the directors and dubbers had a hard time with the script I made so that was the end of my career as a dubbing writer. I felt so bad for them since they stayed up all night editing the script that was supposedly edited already. (Although, they said the grammar bit of the script was fantastic...) After that, I told myself I'm sticking with blogging.

Bloggers have the freedom to write whatever they want to write about, bash whoever they want to, or destroy evil men and women who think they are better than other people just because they call themselves elite.

What about you, why do you blog?

A blog (an abridgment of the term web log) is a website, usually maintained by an individual, with regular entries of commentary, descriptions of events, or other material such as graphics or video. Entries are commonly displayed in reverse chronological order. "Blog" can also be used as a verb, meaning to maintain or add content to a blog.
--WIKIPEDIA

Here are some popular blogging terms from WIKIPEDIA (again...what will the internet be without wiki huh?!) that are absolutely entertaining to know...

Blaudience --The audience, or readership, of a blog

Bloggerazzi- Blogs written by blogger stalkers (a portmanteau of "blog" and "paparazzi)". (is this true? are bloggerazzis out there?!? Can someone point me to the blogs of blogger stalkers please?)

Blooger --A blogger who exhibits adolescent tendencies and lacks basic social graces or good manners. A portmanteau of "blog" and "booger."

Blogorrhea--A portmanteau of "blog" and "logorrhea", meaning excessive and/or incoherent talkativeness in a weblog. (sounds like diarrhea..)

Blogsnob--A person who refuses to respond to comments on their blog from people outside their circle of friends. (Don't be a blogsnob!)

PENUS--Potentially Exciting News Under Scrutiny. Use this when you have something big that you can't wait to show to the blogosphere. (I think Brian Gorrell of http://delfindjmontano.blogpot.com and Kitty Go of http://chichitsthefan.blogspot.com have done successfully well in announcing their penuses to the blogosphere.)

Writing Again

I haven't posted anything in almost two years and the reason for this was because in my current office, blogspot is banned (at least from my station). However, as I am writing this, I am using the department's only super computer and I tried my blogspot account and it went through!

So here I am writing again...and I really missed doing this. Since I've been very busy for the past two years building a career, I totally forgot how writing can help ease stress. For me, writing even the most mundane experiences can help and I don't know why I haven't been able to update this blog for so long. So now I'm back...

When I failed Math ..

Failure is an event, never a person. ~William D. Brown, Welcome Stress!

There is no failure except in no longer trying. ~Elbert Hubbard

Yesterday, I had the most interesting job interview. The hr personnel asked me straight away why I had one failing mark. It's been three years since I graduated and about 7 years ago when I failed that course. So I simply said, "that's because I failed." Anyway, the point is, I don't know if I should feel insulted or irritated because I was reminded of that first failure I ever had in my academic life.

This led me then to my recent failure of getting a much coveted job and an almost failure in doing business. Just thinking about all these things made my head hurt and my heart ache. Why is it hard to accept failure? If failure is an ingredient of success...then I really hope that with all my recent failures, I will come out of it with honors.

I'm a closet drama queen so to speak. I take things hard and blame myself for the failures in my life but someone once told me to take baby steps in life because my feet were not meant to take giant steps. It never did make any sense at that time but I realized that my failures were a result of this race I've been having with life. My sister told me last night that I was still young and that I could still turn my life around and make it better. She was right. So with eyes wide open and arms outstretched I now fully embrace all my failures as a child, sister, daughter, student, worker, and lover.

The Year that was 2005...

Ok, so I'm sort of getting ahead of myself this time. It's not yet 2006 yet and I'm writing as if 2005 passed already. I'm just excited to sum up the whole year since I just turned twenty three last week.

This year was all about new beginnings. I started with having someone in my life who literally changed every tiny bit of my life. Don't get me wrong, I'm not complaining. I needed someone who could truly show me that there was more to life than being jaded. I tried to figure things out as we went along our relationship and soon, I found myself looking at a brand new me. It took lots of guts on his part to stick it out with my stubborn self. I'm not perfect, and I don't intend to be, but I guess even I had to agree that I was a better me because of him.

Another new beginning started last June 17, 2005. It was the day we chose to open a rather risky investment called ORANGE CHICKEN! Everyone at home was having sleepless nights and 18-hour work hours, but it was worth it. Things are not perfect yet, but we're all working hard to do something about it. Putting up a business is not as simple as other people think. It gave me stress, bulges, eyebags, and one simple pleasure: being my own boss. In the end, the store gave us hope that we could still make it here at home sa Pinas. We don't know what the future of the store holds but we can only hope for a better and bigger business.

Yet another start was the fact that I'm starting to consider a career in writing. I used to be realy insecure with my writing but I guess all I needed was someone to push me and believe in me. So, this is it, I hope it really goes well.

There were lots of arguments, situations, circumstances, and the like that makes this year another one to remember. I think I'll bring the rest of the good ones next year.


On another note, I would love to see someone get struck by lightning. **I cross my fingers and wish some more....No pun intended, just wanted to make someone smile, you know how much I love you... =)

The power of words....

I'd like to quote my friend joacs...you have a gift for words..."Knowing something is the beginning of a long process of acceptance. And in the middle of accepting truths and lies in life, sometimes you just have to rechannel that anger or frustration somewhere else. And hopefully, it doesn't accidentally fall on someone you respect and/or love."


I am rechanneling my anger towards writing instead of causing violence and pain. But I do believe in KARMA. Tamaan ka sana ng kidlat.


(smiles...chuckles...and smiles again....thinking if Icould sing the song ako ang nagwagi...or was that the title of that song?!)

TODAY

Today I woke up with a smile
the same smile I had when we got together...
I still look at you lovingly
and I know I will through out the rest of our lives..
when you said you'll do everything....I know you meant it...
I love you rabbit...


Enough said...

Oh the Men in my life..

I'm dying right now waiting for my hubby to fetch me from work. Somehow in the past eight months, my love for this guy grew from zero to infinity. I can't seem t0 get enough of him just like my bestfriend Lara can't get enough of her mr. smooch.

MEN.

We just can't live without them. I know my mom agrees with me. She practically worships the ground my dad walks on...and I can't blame her. Some men can be total jerks but the men in my life are simply awesome. Lee takes care of me like no one else does and even offered to do the laundry when we're married already. (even if he doesn't know how to...) My dad drives me around and thinks I'm still her little girl. My brothers Jig and Jared are my constant companion during dvd marathon nights or late night snacks.

I don't know if it's just pure luck but I am one lucky girl to have them.

To the men in my life, I offer you more laughter and buckets of beer!

Weary

this weary heart
often wonders of that dream

yet wishes seldom come true
lost in the winds of change
to cope is what she must do
declare not the impossible

i promise not to
until that day of yonder


im a little bit pessimistic, less anxious, and more into looking out for what's next after dreaming....

ON COMMITMENT

"The most important, most critical component in successful loving is commitment. Not love."

--part of an essay sent by my bestfriend emogurl..


I remember my favorite teacher in college, Fr. Dacanay, telling us to "think twice before jumping into a commitment because it takes lots of guts to work to it out.." Two years and a couple of months later, I saw myself in the same predicament, this time, with my first, real relationship.

I feel like I'm back in school, only this time, learning the art of commitment. People close to me know just how much of a hard headed, no nonsense "bitch" I can be. I was not one to show buckets of tears, or better yet give my wholeself completely. Pride is the only word I can attribute to it. Yet, in the course of this relationship that I am in, I gave in. I am trying to lose all pride and selfishness for him because he willingly gave up his own.

I guess you could say I finally met my match but the hard part isn't over. Keeping that love alive is the real challenge. Sometimes I see old couples in the movie house holding hands and still looking very much in love. And I say to myself, "I want that kind of relationship, one that undoubtedly stands the test of time, but how?"

Then, I saw myself again sitting in one of Fr. Dacanay's lectures on commitment. I start to smile because I know now the secret of lasting relationships. And boy, it does take lots of guts to work out differences and conflicts, money matters and trivial things, but these are nothing when I know that at the end of the day, I have someone to go home to.



this one's for lee...I owe you, big time.

ORANGE CHICKEN!

Hey everyone....ORANGE CHICKEN! is now open at 8101 Pearl Plaza, Pearl Drive, Ortigas Center, Pasig City!!!!!!!! See you there!!!!!!!!!11

On Any Given Day

You never find yourself until you face the truth. - Pearl Bailey

Life isn't about finding yourself. Life is about creating yourself.
-George Bernard Shaw

I feel that I have lost myself - any centre as it were, has shifted from its natural interests, and that it will take me a long time finding myself again. - Yeats

"Happiness is the experience of loving life. Being happy is being in love with that momentary experience. And love is looking at someone or even something and seeing the absolute best in him/her or it. Love is happiness with what you see. So love and happiness really are the same thing... just expressed differently."
--Robert McPhillips

On any given day, ask me anything about me and I will be able to say something. I have always took it upon myself to get to know me pretty well so much so that I know my dreams, my strengths, and my weaknesses like the back of my hand. And yet, more often than not, things change and people adapt to that change. The future is but a gray area. One can only dream or see a glimpse of it.

Someone once told me that in order to see your future, you must look at your present and the key to your present state is looking at your past. Sounds pretty simple but its actually a hard task at hand.

I know that I have changed a lot and have been transformed by the people around me. Now that an uncertain future lies before my eyes, I realized that I am lost. The only thing I'm certain is my will to survive in the midst of chaos.





Help me survive...

Never Quitting Life

It's tempting to wish for a perfect parent or a perfect boss. But, sometimes, the best we can do is to hang in there and not to quit... to play the hand we've been dealt with and accesorize the outfit we've got. ~ Sex and the City


When things don't go the way you want it to be, hope is instantly lost but is regained again once you've decided to take a step further and do something about it. Sounds pretty easy? Not.

It takes a lot of courage for a kid to stand up and not cry when he or she gets embarassed in front of friends or classmates. It takes a lot of gut for a guy who have been constantly dumped by the same girl to say hi to her again the next day like nothing happened. It takes enormous willpower for an employee to say his ideas when all the big bosses are there. Men and women take great pains in overcoming obstacles in the personal lives. Whether it be issues with family, friends, work, lovelife, social life, and others.

Each of us have different ways in coping with what life is currently offering us and in every little detail of one's life are choices. You may take it upon yourself to do something about a problem or you can just let it pass and hope that someone will rescue you from it. One thing leads to another with the choices that we make.

Sometimes, being alive is tiring. Sometimes all you want to do is dissapear even for just a minute, to feel nothing, to see nothing, to forget... but that's wishful thinking.Truth is, reality bites and when it does, it leaves a mark right at the back of your head and it reminds you to keep going...to hang in there because when you give up on yourself, you stop living.

I refuse to stop living. I am tired, I am weak but I will keep going....

It's a Family Thing

Call it a clan, call it a network, call it a tribe, call it a family:
Whatever you call it, whoever you are, you need one.--Jane Howard

Family life is full of major and minor crises -- the ups and downs of health, success and failure in career, marriage, and divorce -- and all kinds of characters. It is tied to places and events and histories. With all of these felt details, life etches itself into memory and personality. It's difficult to imagine anything more nourishing to the soul.--Thomas Moore


People are lucky because there's this thing called family. Then again maybe some people are luckier because they choose not to have anything to do with their families. I think not and yet either way...a person is only lucky because he chooses to be. It has been proven that no matter what you do, you will still go back to your family.

Being the eldest, I have particularly seen my own family at its best and worst. It's a love and hate relationship for me but at the end of the day, I choose to love. Thinking about having my own family is scary and exciting at the same time. It's a constant sifting of which values to uphold, which traditions to remember, or what things must be thrown out. But how does one adjust to a new family given marriage for example? I know for a fact that when my mom married my dad, she became a new woman by adapting to the ways of my dad's family (which is not bad at all). Is that going to happen to me once I change my surname? I don't know. Maybe not or maybe yes but most probably the important thing to worry about is the family that I'm going to build.

Today, it's harder to marry at a young age since it's tough to raise a family. Some might marry but won't have any kids until after a few years or so. Our helper at home has 6 kids and she barely even earns minimum wage and yet she seems happy with her life. A friend of mine has been married for 5 years, is living a comfortable life but still has no child and has been wanting one. The fact that I'm even writing about this means I'm thinking already of having one but only when the right time comes.

Perfect timing to have one would probably be when I can sleep at night not having to worry about what my child or children will eat the next day, or whether we can send our kid to school or not, or better yet, whether I can give him/her the best things that life has to offer---and I mean not just material things but emotional, intellectual, and physical support.

And though it's a bit scary to jump into the water, when I feel right about it, I'm gonna go ahead and dive. I guess right now the greater goal is to earn enough money because it sure is hella expensive to raise a family. Believe me, I know...my dad has gone bald because of it!

Friendship to the Rescue

How many times have I refused asking for help just because I did not want to bother people with my trivial problems? How many times have I turned down help just when I really needed it? Needless to say, I have become too independent without me knowing it. Not until I became dependent on someone that I realized just how important it is to have a friend, a lover, or family to watch your back every time you make mistakes or you encounter difficulties in life. I knew then that to admit that you are weak doesn't mean you're weak...it only means that you acknowledge your own imperfection.

And as I write this, I recall one of my best girl friends who's undergoing difficulties with her personal life. (Yes, it may seem that you never learn from past mistakes but it's there to make you sure that you do the next time a similar problem appears in your life..) Another close friend is undergoing marital problems, a slightly deeper one than the former friend I mentioned. She already lost 15 lbs. just thinking about it. Not a really good way to lose weight though. Anyway, we all decided to meet up one of these days just to talk.

For me, it is important for a woman to have a close set of girl friends to run to each time she is faced with trials or bumps on her road. Much like the celebrated Sex and the City women who seem to have been the shock absorber of each other. Certainly, it's way better than to pay an expensive psychiatrist who treats your problem scientifically rather than to empathize with you.

So I guess to all my girl friends, here's a little note: it's ok to ask for help expecially when you know that what you need is a woman's ear.

His Wretched Soul

I know a man..
who lost his spirit
who couldn't be
what he wanted to be
who thinks he's less
but in truth,
he was more

His eyes speak of a battered soul
indefinite and swollen
insecurity grips him
his heart, torn apart
alone, he stood
against a life
he wanted to vanish from
his voice,
paved the way to freedom
but left him wounded to the core

I know a man who's like a little child

I know...
Because tonight, I sing to him my greatest lullaby...



It was and still is worth the risk to be with you...

Baby Talk

I've been catching up on my mail lately and I have been inspired by what people have been seending. Normally I would just delete forwarded messages but I really couldn't help but be touched about this one email I got. Here it goes....

What does Love mean?

A group of professional people posed this question to a group of 4- to 8-year-olds, "What does love mean?" The answers they got were broader and deeper than anyone could have imagined. See what you think:

"When my grandmother got arthritis, she couldn't bend over and paint her toenails anymore. So my grandfather does it for her all the time, even when his hands got arthritis too. That's love."
Rebecca- age 8

When someone loves you, the way they say your name is different. You just know that your name is safe in their mouth."
Billy - age 4

"Love is when a girl puts on perfume and a boy puts on shaving cologne and they go out and smell each other."
Karl - age 5

"Love is when you go out to eat and give somebody most of your French fries without making them give you any of theirs."
Chrissy -age 6

"Love is what makes you smile when you're tired."
Terri - age 4

"Love is when my mommy makes coffee for my daddy and she takes a sip before giving it to him, to make sure the taste is OK."
Danny - age 7


"Love is when you kiss all the time. Then when you get tired of kissing, you still want to be together and you talk more. My Mommy and Daddy are like that. They look gross when they kiss"
Emily - age 8


"Love is what's in the room with you at Christmas if you stop opening presents and listen."
Bobby - age 7 (Wow!)

"If you want to learn to love better, you should start with a friend who you hate,"
Nikka - age 6 (we need a few million more Nikka's on this planet)


"Love is when you tell a guy you like his shirt, then he wears it everyday."
Noelle - age 7


"Love is like a little old woman and a little old man who are still friends even after they know each other so well."
Tommy - age 6


"During my piano recital, I was on a stage and I was scared. I looked at all the people watching me and saw my daddy waving and smiling. He was the only one doing that. I wasn't scared anymore."
Cindy - age 8


"My mommy loves me more than anybody. You don't see anyone else kissing me to sleep at night."
Clare - age 6


"Love is when Mommy gives Daddy the best piece of chicken."
Elaine-age 5


"Love is when Mommy sees Daddy smelly and sweaty and still says he is handsomer than Robert Redford."
Chris - age 7


"Love is when your puppy licks your face even after you left him alone all day." (my personal favorite)
Mary Ann - age 4


"I know my older sister loves me because she gives me all her old clothes and has to go out and buy new ones."
Lauren - age 4

"When you love somebody, your eyelashes go up and down and little stars come out of you." (what an imagination)
Karen - age 7

"Love is when Mommy sees Daddy on the toilet and she doesn't think it's gross."
Mark - age 6

"You really shouldn't say 'I love you' unless you mean it. But if you mean it, you should say it a lot. People forget."
Jessica - age 8

And the final one -- Author and lecturer Leo Buscaglia once talked about a contest he was asked to judge. The purpose of the contest was to find the most caring child.

The winner was a four year old child whose next door neighbor was an elderly gentleman who had recently lost his wife. Upon seeing the man cry, the little boy went into the old gentleman's yard, climbed onto his lap, and just sat there. When his Mother asked what he had said to the neighbor, the little boy said, "Nothing, I just helped him cry"

Riding the Bus

Love is like waiting for a bus. When the bus comes, you look at it and you say to yourself "eeee...so full....cannot sit down, I'll wait for the next one."So you let the bus go and waited for the second bus. Then the second bus came, you looked at it and you said, "eeee...this bus is so old...so shabby!"

So you let the bus go and again, decided to wait for the next bus. After a while another bus came, it's not crowded,not old but you said, "eeee...not air conditioned...better wait for the next one." So again you let the bus go and decided to wait for the next
bus. Then the sky started to get dark as it was getting late. You panicked and jumped immediately inside the next bus. It is not until much later that you found out that you had boarded the wrong bus!
And you wasted your time and money just to get into the wrong one!
Even if an air conditioned bus comes, you can't ensure that the air conditioned bus won't break down or whether or not the airconditioner will be too cold for you.

Wanting to get what you want is not wrong. But it wouldn't hurt to give other people a chance. If you find that the "bus" doesn't suit you just press the red button and get off the bus! Hey, who
said life is fair??? The best thing to do is be observant and open-minded. If it doesn't suit you, get off.

I'm sure you've had this experience before. You saw a bus coming (the bus you want of course). You flagged it but the driver acted as if he did not see you and zoomed pass you! It just wasn't meant
for you!

The bottom line is, being loved is like waiting for a bus you want. Getting on the bus and appreciating the bus by giving it a chance depends totally on you. If you haven't made any choice, WALK!
Waking is like being single. The good side of it is you can still choose any bus you want...the rest who couldn't afford another ride would just have to be content with the bus they rode on, ugly
or not.

Also, sometimes it is better to choose a bus you are already familiar with rather than to gamble with a bus that is unfamiliar to you. But then again, life wouldn't be complete without the risks involved.But there is one bus that I failed to tell you
about.- the Bus you do not have to wait for, the Bus that will stop on its own and ask you if you wish to come inside, then take you for a joy ride for the rest of your life.

Hope you get to ride on that bus! :)


I got this thing from my bestfriend Yssa...I am happy to tell every one that I got on that bus...and because I chose well..I got the best ride...

Harmonica

Music flowing
Through sun-scorched lips
The melody,
Almost in tune with the wind
Almost in chorus with the sound of the busy street
The Rhythm
Seemingly melancholic
Strange yet familiar
Soothing yet disturbing
With memories so vivid
It was almost surreal
His eyes no longer see
The wonder of the world
His arms no longer hold
The face of a nameless child
His legs no longer tread
The path of the mighty
The air from his mouth
Speak of a forgotten past
Breathing into the harmonica
And out to the empty space
Where the living dwell
With lives as bleak as his


Jen
2004


was written for and inspired by the man with no name...

When Hari ng Sablay Falls

Yesterday my brother got into a minor car accident that left him with a nasty lip bruise all because he chose to ride with his classmate all the way from Mamplasan to Makati. Apparently his friend had a history of over speeding and a couple of hit and runs.

My initial reaction was concern over my brother who has been accident prone ever since he was a kid. He would normally fall from a double deck bed or drop a glass of water so it wasn't really much of a surprise anymore when he got into this accident. Yet, I have to admit that this was different because he could have been seriously hurt or we could have lost him.

Among the four us, we all know that Jared is the most special sibling from the time he was born. He was a premature baby and he was able to fit into a shoe box. Every one thought he was not going to make it. In fact, he even had his baptism right there in Manila Sanitarium. When he was growing up, we noticed a lot of his quirky ways and mannerism. Almost always he would normally forget stuff even when you just mentioned it to him a couple of seconds ago. He would get bumps and bruises from being too hyper. One time, he even fell of a tricycle which left him with blood clots in his head. Inspite of his ways, Jared was very loving and sociable. He was able to mingle with people from all walks of life. He was also mature in dealing with his own problems. Moreover, he is one of the most popular and smart guys in his batch.

In his lifetime, my brother has probably endured a lot of pain that he already developed a high tolerance for it. Sometimes we would tease him and call him "hari ng sablay" (as in Sugarfree's current hit.) Inspite of this, I am proud that he is my brother. He is my ally and my friend and I wouldn't want to lose him over some freaking careless driver. Sometimes I worry about him but I guess I would have to leave him be to learn his lessons well.


Bro, take care of yourself ayt?

Mom for a Day

Some mothers are kissing mothers and some are scolding mothers, but it is love just the same, and most mothers kiss and scold together. ~Pearl S. Buck

Yesterday, I found myself babysitting two little boys. Their dad asked me to look out for them and watch the movie Robots since he will be out of the country on a business trip. I immediately said yes because one of those boys was my student.

Kienan showed me around the house and told me lots of stories while we were eating. I found myself scolding him and telling him not to talk because his mouth was full, or to sit down properly because he might fall. Memories of my mom doing the same thing to me flashed back into my head and then it occured to me that I was being a mom.

Later on, we went to Rockwell to meet up with his younger brother Kenny who was even more hyper than Kienan. Each of them held my hand while we were strolling at the mall. I was careful and cautious even when there were two helpers with me. I did not want anything to happen to them. I realized that this was probably what mothers feel all the time...that overwhelming responsibility over those little souls.

It was only during the past few years that I have developed a harmonious relationship with my mom. To me she was the most generous person but she was also such a nagger and control freak because she screams and scolds at us most of the time. But, then again because I have gotten older, I know now that my mom just loved us so much. So when she does a little bit of both hugging and screaming..it only means that we are loved.


For all the things you've done and sacrificed for us...thanks mom...